Introducing So

So after my rant about my questionable occupation, it is obvious that my life is most occupied by a husband and three kids who I mentioned briefly. I could probably devote blog after blog rehashing our entire lives for the past eight, nine years, but even I don't want to relive every moment. However, I should probably share a brief description of each of my kids and my husband as well, so you will understand how each one slowly and methodically sucks the life out of me in their own unique way.

I will start with my first born, the daughter I always knew I needed to have. So is six years old going on twenty - two. She is pretty precocious for her age and has a very noticeable "old soul" about her (which might explain all her questions about her past lives, we'll get back to that later). She is actually one of the younger ones in her peer group, as she was born in September, however, her height and maturity cause many to have high expectations of her. When she was two, and still in diapers, a few kindly women expressed their concern for her lack of bladder control. When I asked them how old they thought she might be, they all thought she was four. I guess I can't blame them, So was having an extensive conversation with them about the cause and effect ratio between global warming and the radiating heat on the slides in the playground. But, do not take my word for it. When So was three she went to a birthday party for a girl who was in the same class as her in the local community center. The birthday took place in August, and So had not seen many of the friends attending since June. The Grandmother of the birthday girl is a known child psychologist and attended the birthday as well. When I went to pick So up from the party, the Grandma stopped me and said, "So is a very extraordinary child".
Me: (heart palpitations, knowing she is a child psychologist) "Why do you say that"?
Grandma: "She speaks with such maturity".
Me: "Oh, what did she say"?
Grandma "Well, she came in and said , Oh, girl A, I haven't seen you in such a long time, how have you been"? and when it was time for cake and ice cream she said, "I have had a filling breakfast, so I will just have a small piece of cake, please".
She is only three years old, can't she just ignore all the other three year olds like they do each other? Can't she just say "Gimmee gimmee, I want cake" like the rest of them?


Well I knew this was to be expected. Let me explain...

I am by no means a psychic, but I would say I have great intuition about people and other things and I am pretty good about following my gut and going with my first instinct. This little known fact about me (which makes great party conversation by the way) is even more heightened when I am pregnant. I am three for three when it comes to guessing my fetus in utero's gender. Okay, this does not seem like an earth shattering feat. But, I am also three for three when it comes to describing my fetus in utero's personality. This may include things such as, their temperament, learning abilities, likes and dislikes, disposition, talents, etc... Interesting though, I can only make these predictions when I begin to feel the baby moving. The way the fetus moves helps contribute to my gut instinct about what is in store for us. These predictions are then shared only with my husband.

In the case of So, I predicted she would not be too demanding as a baby, but she would not be a perfect little marshmallow either. She would be a child who would need constant entertainment and human interaction. She feeds on it and can not occupy herself for more than fifteen minutes. She would be ambitious and constantly strive for perfection even though no one is putting this sort of pressure on her. She would be verbal and an avid reader (we call her motor mouth). She would be extremely outgoing and social. She is an absolute extrovert who can not keep a secret and shares everything. And although she hears everything, she can also be oblivious to something happening right under her nose.

Of course making these predictions took a few years to validate. Most of these predictions were validated by the time I was pregnant with my second (Ro's predictions to come in a future blog) so of course my husband was curious about my feelings towards my second pregnancy. You might think, how different could it possibly be, oh you have no idea. When I was pregnant with Ate, my husband said, "You got the other two so right, very specifically right, so tell me about this one". Well Ate is two now and I am definitely three for three.

Well back to So, she was born September 18 2002 in Lenox Hill Hospital in New York. She was 9 lbs. 6 oz. and 21 and 1/4 inches long - BIG!!! And this was already causing big problems. She got that big because I was almost 2 weeks overdue. Because my Doctor did not want me to have such a big baby (too late) and also probably because it was 2 days before Succos (Doc M. is traditional Jew, he studies Talmud and knows all the right Rabbis to go to for answers to pregnancy questions requiring insight into Jewish law) I was induced. During my 24 hours of labor this incredible Doctor, Doc M. was in hospital the entire time and checking up on me personally. Did I mention he is Israeli and was a sharp shooter in the Israeli army and also pioneered advances in fertility medicine in Israel. Well he did, mentioned it many times. Well this went over very well with my Israeli husband. When I was NPO (nothing by mouth for you non-nurses ) my husband ordered two complete dinners from Galiel, a great Israeli restaurant in Manhattan, and he and Doc M. had a great time chatting in their fluent Hebrew while eating amazing smelling chicken Tarjin, while I suffered in the corner by myself through contraction after contraction (just call in the damn candy man and shoot me up with something sweet). Anyway I really did like Doctor M., Lenox Hill - not so much.

I wanted So to room in with me, which you can only do if you have a private room. Well LH only has a few private rooms and even if you want one, insurance won't cover private rooms so long as there are shared rooms available. I hate insurance (I will repeat this sentiment in many upcoming blogs). I could not imagine sharing a room and trying to recover from delivering a watermelon while rooming with Mrs. Golostopus, while her 42 Greek family members are breaking plates and yelling "Opa". And this in a room the size of two minivans. I said to Hun, "Hun, We will pay 300.00 a night, just look at it as a vacation at a pricey hotel"(right). Hun did not argue the point, smart decision. Only problem was, there was only a slight possibility that a private room would become available. While I prayed that Mrs. A did decide to check out a little early, I was informed that my beautiful brand new baby girl would require around the clock heel sticks to check her blood sugar as she was a large baby. This would mean So could not room in with me and would require staying in the newborn nursery. (Did I mention when I was employed as a nurse, I worked in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit?)

First of all, my baby is large because that is how we do it in my family. We don't do things small in the S. family. Second, she is almost 2 weeks overdue, probably gaining a pound per each overdue week. She does not need her heel stuck and she will not be staying in the newborn nursery, partly because I know if she is out of my sight for a nanosecond she will be switched with some other woman's baby and I will only find out about this 15 years later. Okay, that may seem like a fear unfounded, but you will see later (when I write Ro's blog) it does not go away. (At least I didn't put the hot pink nail polish on her nails for identifying purposes). As my husband, mortified, watched me argue with the nurse about the importance of So staying with me and that I knew what signs to look for in case of hypoglycemia, another nurse informed us that a private room became available. WE WANT IT!!!!

In the end, we took the private room, So roomed in the whole time, except the 4 times in the first six hours of life she was wheeled to the nursery for her heel stick (of course Hun accompanied her every time and assured me I got the right baby back with each return). At least she did not have to stay in the nursery. In the meantime I was developing some weird ultra itchy rash everywhere on my body, except my face, thankfully, which Doc M. determined was the Fifth Disease (because it certainly wasn't diseases one through four). After calling in a dermatology specialist, I learned about PUPS. A rash only a few women develop before delivery which goes away upon delivery. Well if it's rare, Orah gets it, that's the rule. And it not only did not go away upon delivery, it got worse for up to 2 weeks postpartum. Worse itch ever, made for a great Succos.

Well that's So, predetermined and determined, and she continues to determine... everything about my life that is not determined by Hun and the other two kids. She is my bright, precocious, socially ambitious, affirmation needy, loud, extroverted, somewhat oblivious, bundle of love.