I Have The Right To Remain Silent (but then I would have no post)

WARNING:

By reading ahead you may unwillingly become an accessory to a crime.




I am officially a delinquent. And I have taken my husband down with me.

I am a miscreant,
desperado,
outlaw,
hoodlum,
law breaker.


I am ashamed to admit that I have contributed to the pervasiveness of some criminal activity.

But even worse, I have no regrets.

Two Saturday nights ago, my husband generously offered to take me out. We were considering many options, but by the time we actually made it out of the house, many of those options had become obsolete. So we settled on seeing a movie.

I wanted to see the action packed manly movie "Law Abiding Citizen", but my overworked, stressed out hubby wanted something lighter and amusing. Only, there were no comedies that I really thought, appealing.

So I looked through the newspaper and told him of the few comedies that were playing and then he said,
"I would see "Motherhood".


Seriously???

I want to see Gerard Butler kick the faulty judicial process in the A$$ and Hun wants to see Uma Thurman kvetch about life as a mother.

If my husband has FORGOTTEN what it looks like when a woman kvetches about her motherly duties, then we REALLY have not been spending enough time together. Thank G-d for date night.

So I agreed to see it .... with a warning.

There would be a Q & A session at the end, a discussion if you will. Hun would have to share his thoughts as the movies depiction of "Motherhood" relates to his real life placement married to a woman who is, well, a Mother.

Of course, I was totally joking. But Hun was agreeable. I think he would have written me a 500 word essay critique on the movie had I asked him. He was obviously in a work coma, and was not digesting anything I was saying anyway. He just wanted to see a movie that he did not have to put much thought into.

And with that, we were off.

Before the movie started, we had time to go to a near by "Barnes and Nobles" where I got a much needed Venti fix of caffeine at "Starbucks" and Hun purchased some sought after "Political" magazines. (NO, that is not a euphemism for some sort of dirty magazine, they WERE actually Political Magazines.)

Then, back to the theater...

So for two hours I sat there and pretty much watched my life unfold right before my eyes. I mean, I seriously could have stared at myself in a mirror for two hours and would have seen the same sacrifices, stress, frustration, commitment, joy, pride... Uma's character was even a "Mommy" blogger. Her blogging was pretty much the main premise. Hun laughed when Uma kept calling her husband on his cell phone and he would never answer.
Why is that funny to him? It is so NOT funny when it happens in MY life.

When the movie was finished, I sort of felt as if I had never left my home that evening. It was not satisfying to me. There was no new wisdom to be had from that movie.

Hun grabbed his bag of highly entertaining Political magazines and we left the theater, and I still wanted my date night.

I looked ahead of me, and asked Hun,
"What time is it"?

"It's 10:50, why"?

"Great, perfect, let's go".

"Go where"?

"Right there, started at 10:40".

Next thing you know, we went from theater 11 to theater 13 and just in time (missed previews) for "Law Abiding Citizen".

At first we sat down in one of the head craning front row seats because, even I did not think I would stay the entire time. Certainly, Hun would never...

After two minutes of a most disturbing opening scene, we were riveted. And we were also disturbed by the cricks in our necks, so we decided to move up to locate better seats. But this was not your "Motherhood" for a few lame couples, this place was packed.

I found a row, one guy sitting at the aisle, an empty seat, a couple and another empty seat. So I kindly asked the couple if they wouldn't mind moving down a seat so we can create two seats together. Then it occurred to me as we were entering the row, that I never asked the guy on the aisle if the seat next to him was actually occupied. But we all know the lonely guy who has to see the manly movie alone, and thus the seat was available.

At about 20 minutes into the movie, I had already forgotten about my wayward ways and my bad influence on Hun. (If you know my husband, he is as straight as an arrow. I would have loved to just send him into a 7/11 to shoplift a Hershey bar just for the sake of it, but I would have to settle for movie thievery.) But just as I was getting comfortable, I could see out of the corner of my left eye, a huge, burly usher with a flashlight walking up the aisle stairway towards my row.

Please pass my row
Please pass my row
Please pass my row

No such luck.

He stood exactly AT my row and his flashlight shone across my lap. I felt like the Gestapo had arrived and my heart was racing.

Do not make eye contact
Do not make eye contact
Do not make eye contact

I was sure there were security cameras all throughout that building that watched us as we made our nefarious walk out one theater into the next and the usher was trying desperately to identify the culprits in the dark. I was expecting that we would be taking a walk of shame any minute.

But after what felt like an eternity, although probably less than a minute, he turned and walked away.

And we sat, and watched the entire movie. This movie was, suspenseful, riveting, a roller coaster ride of thrills and spills, nothing like my life the movie "Motherhood".

And at the end, Hun remarked,
"That was better than I expected."

VICTORY!!!

But I will tell ya something, Karma is a bitch.

It seems that while watching the movie, Hun's very desirable Political magazines went missing. We looked everywhere. In the original seats and the current seats, under and over, no where to be found.

I didn't lose anything though, so what does that mean?

So who is the "Law Abiding Citizen"?

NOT ME!!!

And it felt soooo good.

Something's Got To Give -

BLOGCATION OVER!!!

Are women really as multifunctional as we claim to be? We pride ourselves on our exceptional multitasking abilities. But is this phenomenon really truthful?

Yes, I can have a conversation on the phone, update my Facebook status, hold a 5 month old on my left hip and mix a mean bottle of formula with my right hand all at the same time, but I am not referring to those moments we women become a "Cirque du Soleil" juggling act.

I am referring to the grander picture.

That picture that captures us in our true light, as we take way to much on our plates.

Some of us work outside the home, some of us don't. Either way, beyond office work or housework, we are always working on something. We chauffeur our children to extracurricular activities. We join "PTA" and "Sisterhoods", because "Motherhood" is not enough. We volunteer to coordinate something or another for one organization or another. We join gyms or run marathons or try "Bollywood" dance classes. We become botonists and landscapers and furniture refurbishers and professional couponers and savvy shoppers, and at some point we may just want to sit down and watch "Grey's Anatomy" uninterrupted.

But in order to do it ALL, something has to give.

The laundry piles up a bit longer than we hoped. Our dining room table becomes a petri dish of bacteria-like growth called "clutter". We don't wash the dinner dishes until after breakfast the next day. Instead of home cooked meals, we resort to carry out.

The truth is, we CAN NOT do it ALL, ALL of the time.

Because to do that, we would not be human. We would be androids who look just like ourselves built by a very wise and wealthy woman.

And I imagine, those women who are not fortunate to have a partner in their life to help them avoid spreading themselves too thin, are not faring any better.

And so, these past two weeks, what I chose to let go -

my blog.

In order to be an appropriate functioning mother, who felt very much like a single parent while Hun was working extraordinarily to provide for his family, I LET GO OF MY BLOG.

I did not want to. I did not completely do so by choice. I figured it would behoove me to continue with the laundry so my family members would not have to go naked. I kept up with the dish washing so my house would not reek of dried on gravy bits. I prevented my dining room table from growing anything funky. And I am pretty sure my children were sent off to school hygienically acceptable, with completed homework and lunch in their bags.

But my blog ..... given a large dose of tranquilizing meds, enough to last two weeks.

I am very proud of my husband who has created a whole new line in his business as well as new product, but the busier he becomes, the busier I become. And it was grueling.

He has been extremely busy for way more than two weeks, working on his latest projects, but two weeks ago, he was preparing to debut a new line at a food show, and this past week he wast out of town at THAT food show.

I digress to make a public plea.

My husband loves me and supports me and the things I choose to do, but does not care for the world of blogging. I do not refer to him too much in my posts and I do not talk too much about his work. However, he knows he will come up from time to time, because he chose to marry me. And with that comes .... my blog and all who are in my life. For those of you who know my husband IRL, please to not approach him and chit chat about all the things you know of him via my blog. He does not care to hear it. And what he does not know can not hurt him.

He was so busy, that out of guilt complete and utter love and devotion, he took me out the Saturday night before he went out of town. (But more on that in the next post.)

Would his hard work have been enough to cause me to take a blogcation?

Probably not.

But here is how it works in my household.

When Hun is not around, that is when Murphy and his crappy law shows up.

I don't even know how long it would take me right now to link to my previous post about the time I got some bizarre phone calls in middle of the night when Hun was away. It was 3 in the morning and the same call and hang up came repeatedly, leaving me to believe I was about to be murdered in my sleep. So that left me with no choice, but to NOT fall asleep.

But I will link to this one, which is aptly titled

Murphy's Law Can Suck It!!! .

And I link to that one, because it was Deja friggin' vu all over again.

And why is 3 in the morning the magic number?

On top of one teething five month old, who has me up all night "Catering" to his bizarre needs, Ro decided that vomit is a necessity when Hun is away.

First, just call me Emeril Lagasse.
My baby has learned to roll from his stomach to his back. That is fine enough. But he has, since birth, been sleeping on his belly. He does not care to sleep on his back. But he does care to constantly, roll from his belly to his back throughout the night, waking himself up unnecessarily, causing me to flip him over, pretty much on the hour, like he is a flapjack.
BAM!
Yes, I am Emeril Lagasse, all .... night .... long.

And on Tuesday night, oh the joys of vomit. Not once, twice to be exact. But when there was no more vomit, uh, well, there is always that other end of the body.

And Ro did me the great service of NOT making it to the bathroom. So there I was, flipping babies and scrubbing puke out of carpet at 3 in the morning, and... what is that?

Is someone barking?

Are you friggin' kidding me?

Does Ate have croup, AGAIN?

Flipping babies, scrubbing vomit, setting up humidifiers,
thank you So for being an obliging child this past week.

Oh, wait, So is my child who likes to wake up at 5 AM and drag chairs and slam cabinet doors looking for anything she can turn into a project.

I love my kids. I love being a mother. But it is much more enjoyable when I can share these unexpected "duties" with my partner in life. Although I typically can't. Because these are special "duties" which only arise when my partner in life is happily tucked away in some child free hotel room somewhere.

So sue me for taking a blogcation. Something had to give. And there was no way it was going to be "Grey's Anatomy".

My Excuse

FINISHING UP A

BLOGCATION!


BE BACK


SOON!

I Am On a High!

Hi! I'm Orah. Welcome to my blog.


Where I watch the news so you don't have to.



I will not give the Henne family one more minute of attention.
(Well, after this one more minute of course)

Let me just say, like many others

I CALLED IT!

In my last post, which was written and posted within an hour and a half of discovering Falcon safely at home where he claimed to be hiding in a cardboard box in the attic,

I called it a HOAX.

Before balloon boy vomited twice the next day, on two separate morning shows when asked why he was hiding, before he stated on Larry King,
"We did it for the show..."

I said, that his whack job of a father hid him and CONVENIENTLY called a TV station helicopter instead of a Police or Fire rescue chopper to track his son "flying" in a balloon, to get himself some
ATENCIONE`.

I also saw some of his video scripted movie footage of the "mistaken" balloon launch, and let me just say,
his wife is not a very good actress, and his timing was off.

He yelled,
"Didn't I tell you not to let go of the (expletive) tethers."

At which point, she THEN let go of the (expletive) tethers and said, in a tiny voice,
"oh no."

They were already on a reality TV show called "Wife Swap" twice - where this "Bad Dad" displays much more questionable behavior for the cameras.

He met his wife in "acting" class.

He has been shopping around his own
"Reality TV Show" idea about the "Wacky and Crazy Henne Scientists", which was nixed by TLC.

And then he claims this was not a Hoax, because what would he gain from it...


Uh, I'm gonna go out on a limb here.....

ATTENTION!!!

I'll give you some attention FREAK.

And my attention comes in the form of a wiffle stick beating your A$$ for stealing hours of my life as I worried sincerely about a child who was not even my own.

I am on my way to Colorado and I want those hours back...
Oh, you better run.
-----------------------------------------------------
And now I move on to this guy!






How ironic that he is referred to as a "Justice of the PEACE".

Where is the peace? Where is the love? Where is the lack of racism?

You claim not to be a racist, because, according to you racism implies,
"hating blacks"
or
"not treating everyone equally"

How is it treating everyone equally, if you choose to marry only same race couples and not mixed couples?

I mean, am I the retard here?

Because I watched the video, and I think you may have some wires crossed in that small brain of yours.

(I do not mean to offend any developmentally disabled people)

But, how slow are you? Are you drinking water from the Louisiana Bayou? Because, I hear that water can cause you to have some gnarly "offspring".

Oh, now I get it. Your parents drank from the Louisiana Bayou, and thus - you would be their "offspring".

---------------------------------------------

Seriously, I do need to stop watching so much news. But the media makes it sooo much fun, because they never report on anything "seriously important" anymore. So, if it's not really "news worthy" news, that means I get to make fun of it. And I love making fun of people like Keith Bardwell.

"Everyone hates [you] and [you] don't know why."

REALLY???


REALLY???

Well, at least you love yourself.


WHERE IS MY INTERVENTION, PEOPLE???

PLEASE GET ME OFF MY "NEWS" HIGH!

"Balloon" Boy Turns Out To Be "Cardboard Box" Boy

Did I just waste hours of my life, or did I just waste hours of my life?


My affinity to being a "News" whore has gotten out of hand.

Unfolding Hostage crisis?

I am there.

High School killing spree?

I am glued.

Plane crash in Hudson?

Where's the remote at?

Hour long car chase on the "94"?

Uhhh , I don't do car chases. Time to take a potty break.


Balloon Boy?

Who saw this one coming?

I had a long night last night. Bam was not cooperating and chose to wake every two hours. And while he was actually sleeping , he would whimper in his sleep, causing me that sudden jolt of heart arrhythmia just as I was falling into blissful sleep. Hun was out of town the past two days. I had plenty to do today, but not much desire, strength or will to do it.

I spent the better part of the morning working on a fund raising letter, jogging on a treadmill, taking care of a gassy baby and chauffeuring Ate to and from school. I was so consumed by my morning activities, I did not really sit down and eat. So after I brought Ate home and got him into bed for a nap, followed by an overtired sleeping baby, at about 1:45 I decided to sit down in front of MSNBC with my Ceareekamole salad. (That is what I call it when it encompasses Caesar, Greek and Guacamole on account of the Caesar croutons and dressing, Feta cheese and avocado.)

Before I knew it, I was watching an oversized, helium filled Mylar balloon, cascading through the sky boarded by the words "Breaking News".

Ooh - what is that? Orah's entertainment for the next FEW minutes?

I am a bit embarrassed to admit, I did not get up from my seat until 4:20. And furthermore, I was giving a play by play account on Facebook to my friend who was at work and therefore not in the vicinity of televised news.

Who am I kidding? She could care less. I was "status updating" to anyone who could hear my cries of astonishment and nausea.

I was LITERALLY sick to my stomach. I was so scared for a six year old boy who was thought to be flying at least 1000 feet up in an escaped, family "science project" over Colorado.

Was he going to freeze up there in the colder air? Was he unconscious from the change in atmosphere. Did he pass out from lack of Oxygen? Was he crying for his Mommy in a funny chipmunk voice due to Helium inhalation? Did he have altitude sickness? Was he sitting in a pile of vomit from motion sickness?
(All kidding aside, it was less than funny at the time. I would not have referred to him as "Balloon Boy" at the time.)

I was beside myself. I was a nervous wreck. It was as if I was watching my own 6 year old child floating away through a time/space continuum.

My friends were telling me to get a life. They were cajoling me to divert my attention to something else. We tried to refer to "Coffee Talk" with Linda Richmond...

A peanut is neither a pea or a nut...

Discuss!!!


A shoetree is neither a shoe or a tree...

Discuss!!!

But all I could think of ......... a balloon is neither a ball or a loon,

at which point, via DISCUSSION, my friend did refer to me as a loon.

I was even offered an on the spot intervention (which I do need).

My children were all accounted for, asleep or in school. At least I hoped this was the case. I mean, I had no tethered, helium filled balloons in my backyard for anyone to crawl into.

So I was free and clear to keep my eyes affixed to a flying ......... uh wait .....I mean, slowly spinning ............ uh, now softly dropping ......... silvery deflating balloon.

And the news channel had warned that if the balloon looked as if it would crash, they would cut the feed until they were assured of the boy's safety. But they lied.

I saw it drop. I saw authority figures walk over to this odd looking apparatus. I saw one guy hacking at it with a shovel. I saw NO child emerging, unscathed.

WHERE IS THE BOY??? Oh My G-d, did the poor thing fall out somewhere? I can not rest until they find the child.

But alas, I had to shut the TV (which I do not have on while my children are at home, awake and in need of attention). But the Internet became my new drug of choice. The Internet became my best friend. In the midst of supper making and homework doing .... the news came in -

HE IS ALIVE!!!


In a cardboard box ..... in his garage.


After half a second of gratefulness for his health and well being, I was sort of disappointed. (Admit it - you all were too.)

I mean, I certainly wanted him to be okay, but where was this mysterious bottom compartment that he "climbed" into?

Where was the "piece" of balloon that witnesses (including a Deputy Sheriff) claim to have seen fall from the balloon?

And the background of this family........

Dad was a storm chaser. They are an "adventurous" family. They are Science geeks lovers. They were on an episode of "Wife Swap"?

Could they have swapped their son, (who for a flying boy had the most perfect name, Falcon) and covered it up with the ol' "oversized balloon distraction"? I mean, a woman recently swapped two children for a cockatoo, so anything is possible (seriously, I have to lay off the news).

Dad WAS the one who called "KUSA" news station as soon as the balloon took flight and asked them to track it. Did he do this because he was, like the rest of us, under the false impression that his son was in flight? Or did he do this just after he hid his son in a cardboard box in the garage so he could gain attention for his wonderful family science project? I mean, why a "news" station? Don't the Colorado Police and Fire Rescue dispatch their own helicopters?

I still think there are a lot of unanswered questions. And when all the kids are back in bed, I expect MSNBC to have the answers.

I do not blame the child, though. Poor thing. If I untethered the object that my father was working on for months while neglecting me and paying me no attention, and watched it float away - I would hide too if I thought that my father then called the cops on me.

Speaking of neglecting children and paying them no attention, I better go now. There is no telling where my kids would hide if they "accidentally" deleted this post.


I mean, I am not THAT neglectful and inattentive, even if I DID miss Bam roll over for the first time while watching "Balloon Boy".

"Ballon Boy"?

More like "Cardboard Box" Boy.

Love Me Some Fat Babies

Baby Alex Lange with Mother Kelli Lange

This baby is 4 months old and weighs 18 pounds.

He was (originally) denied medical insurance coverage due to his "fat" tushy. I think they referred to baby fat as a "pre-existing condition"

Is the inability to distinguish between obesity and baby fat a pre-existing condition? Because if it is, then the folks at Rocky Mountain Health Plans should be denied coverage as well.

This baby is ALSO 4 months old and ALSO weighs 18 pounds.

He is also 27 inches long and in the 97th percentile for size of babies at this age.

Funny thing - we also call him "chunky monkey" just like the parents of FAT baby Alex do.

I think the insurance company should thank me and offer me a reduced rate for toting around 18 pounds on a regular basis. This causes my biceps to become more accentuated and allows me to burn calories as I build muscle, making me a much healthier individual, almost guaranteeing that Insurance company I call my own will NEVER have to pay out for my growing (or shrinking) healthy physique.

Fat babies really = a win win situation for the Insurance companies, the way I see it.

I guess they saw it too, which is why they changed their policies to include fat HEALTHY babies.

I mean, my 18 pound is very health conscious -

What is that saying?



"An apple a day keeps the Doctor away."

Death Be Not Proud.

"They found her limp and lifeless body under a heap of clothing..."





That may be how my obituary begins.




"She keenly decided that pre, during, and post a significant Holiday while her children were off of school, would be an ideal time to embark on a major overhaul of her upstairs sleeping quarters. That decision may have led to her sudden and unexpected demise due to the tornado of apparel that threw her over and suffocated her..."



Oooh, who wrote this obituary? It is excellent, if I do say so myself.




"She is survived by her loving husband, now and forever adorned in wrinkled shirts and tattered pants. She is also survived by three children between the ages of 7 and 3 who do not know where to sleep because they can not locate their beds, and is also survived by one naked baby."



I will not break. The kids will be back in school tomorrow. I will complete my mission. I will be able to see my upstairs floor again. I will be able to walk through the hallway without setting off one of the many "clothing" mines. I do not have an assistant. I do not have a secretary. I am one person, taking on a mission meant for an army. Wow, the idea of polygamy and taking on more wives suddenly became appealing. Have I gone insane? Maybe! I mean, I am rambling on and on.



Let me backtrack.

I have five bedrooms upstairs. One is the master bedroom, leaving four more. A small bedroom next to mine has a crib in it that is not being used. Next to this much needed crib is a mattress on the floor that Ate calls his bed.

Diagonally across from this small bedroom is a modest sized room with a lovely white bunk bed that I purchased shortly after Ro was born with the idea that two sisters could share a room. Ro calls the bottom bunk hers and the top bunk has remained empty. There is also a lovely pull out trundle for prospective overnight visitors. The joint living did not come to fruition because So wakes up at the crack of dawn and Ro would like NOT to wake up at the crack of dawn. But So is bored and needs a playmate at the crack of dawn they now go to the same school and have to wake at the same time anyway, so may as well open up this new can of worms.

Through another door from this room, is a connected bathroom which is referred to as a "Jack and Jill" bathroom, because it has another doorway to a bedroom further down the hall. That bedroom would be So's room until now.

Across from So's bedroom is one final bedroom that is decorated nicely and is off limits to children. It has it's own bathroom and is currently reserved for guests. However, all my guests become relegated to one of two guest bedrooms in the basement because my upstairs guest room seems to have become a HUGE walk in storage closet.

To further confuse you, I also have bedroom furniture in my garage. It is a dresser to be more precise. I have been refurbishing it for two years. More accurately, I sanded off the ugly brown shade from the dresser two years ago and then got caught up in this thing called "LIFE" and have yet to return to sand the drawers, the frame around the mirror, prime and paint white and find some lovely/girly hardware to finish it off. If I would only do that, my garage would not look like it wants to be an eighth bedroom and the girls would have more appropriate storage so my hall would not look like a minefield.

Partly, I blame my parent's 16 months of living here with half of their home's contents taking up space in my home, for all the mess that I am inundated with, but that is because I pretty much blame my parents for EVERYTHING. (Who doesn't?)

Anyway, if you did your math, you would realize that I have four children and in addition to the master bedroom, I have four more bedrooms upstairs that have the ability to restrain house each of the aforementioned children. But, I do not want my children to take the gift of "space" for granted. I do not want them to be spoiled by the freedom that comes with unshared space.

And so, to punish myself indefinitely teach my children what it means to live cordially amongst others, So and Ro will now move in together. Ate will move into So's former room. And Bam will move into the very empty and available crib in Ate's former room so that Hun and I could live cordially amongst ourselves.

And by punishing myself, I refer to the resurrection of an old sitcom called "The Odd Couple" which I expect to be playing every night and every morning in the bedroom that will officially be shared by my Felix (aka. Ro) and my Oscar (aka. So), and I suspect this sitcom will not be as funny.

Ro probably has some obsessive compulsive personality traits. She lines her shoes up and makes her bed in the morning ...... and makes it again.......... at night, before she gets in it. And then she attempts to make it while she is actually IN IT. She does not like things in middle of her floor, and she has a tissue box on her bed at all times (just in case) and an empty one next to it where she may dispose of her used tissues.

So is ..... how can I say this mildly about a child who I LOVE ...... a slob. This trait of So's is probably directly related to her creative mind. She has a mind that never shuts off. It is all over the place. It is always coming up with exceptional ideas and amazing projects. This includes, but is not limited to a closet project that caused her closet door to miraculously come off its track, when she thought hangers could be arranged to liken a robot.

I decided to pair up this "odd" couple, just this last week, because I wanted the novelty of it to wear off before school resumed. My original timeline was to pair them up during the weeks between camp and school, but if you remember, I was dealing with a nasty plague infesting So's head, and although I do try to teach my children to share ..... there are some exceptions.

Besides for the actual room they are now sharing, they are going from two closets to just one closet. This is where I really have my work cut out for me. Especially since THAT dresser is still sitting in the garage.

In addition to just changing over their rooms and habits, I also have to set Ate up in So's old room and set Ate's old room up to accommodate a baby. I am still changing over Summer to Winter (please tell me I am NOT the only one still doing this). I still have maternity clothing to put away (which my mother has voiced, should NOT be put away and SHOULD be utilized real soon. So I asked my 70 something year old mother if she was trying to give me another sibling and was looking to borrow some maternity clothing. She was not amused. Neither was I.)

I just returned from "The Container Store" where I burned a hole through my credit card. And my overhaul is in full gear. When I am done and everything is in it's proper place, I will then lock up every closet and drawer and prevent every person in this home from living like a normal functioning human being so that NO new mess can be made. Because the idea that my family may never notice the recognizable smell of a decaying corpse and not even notice that their wife and mother has been missing for some time under a mess of clutter and clothing is just too ghastly to consider, even for me. That Death, be not proud.