All Talk

My kids do as many kids do....



....They say things that make me laugh.

While I realize that some of their more memorable and laughable revelations and announcements may actually ONLY be funny to me, I will share them here anyway -

mostly so I can throw out the papers that they are written on.


Me: "Ate, why are you full of paint? How did you get so much paint up your sleeve and in your hair?"

Ate: "Lee (his 3 yr old cousin) painted on me."

Me: "Why did Lee paint on you?"

Ate: "Oh ..... she thought I was an easel."

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Ate: (brings a "little people" playground toy) "Mommy, is this a merry go round?"

Me: "Yes."

Ate: "But this is the go round, where's the merry?"

------------------------------------------------------------------------

So: "Mommy, can I have soda?"

Me: "No, it's not good for you."

So: "You know what's worse than soda?"

Me: "What?"

So: (yelling) "POISON!!"

---------------------------------------------------------------

So has a "Fiona" doll (from Shrek) with stuffing coming out. After I told So and Ro they could not have soda, she asked me if I could fix her doll.

Me: "I will sew up Fiona."

(A minute later I realized Ro was crying for no apparent reason.)

Me: "Ro, why are you crying?"

Ro: "You said you would give So some soda."

Me: (confused) "Huh .......... no, I said I would SEW UP FIONA!!!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So: (in the car) "Mommy, where you taking us?"

Me: "It's a surprise."

So: "But maybe you are taking us to a stranger's house and they will kidnap us."

Me: (sarcastic, of course) "Yes, I am taking you to a stranger's house and leaving you there..."

So: "Noooooooooo, really?"

Me: "If you keep asking me where we're going, I will."

Ate: "TAKE RO TOO!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ate: "My eye is twisted, I need a new one."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So: "What's a first aid kit?"

Me: "Something that contains all you need to help someone if they get hurt or injured."

So: "Like shots?"

Me: "No, more like bandaids and cream..."

So: "Oh ......... so what is a second aid kit?"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ro: "What's for dessert?"

Hun: "Watermelon, strawberries..."

Ro: "No, I mean, like, what is for dessert that is nutritious?"

Hun: "Huh?"

Ro: "You know, like cookies or cake..."

Me: "Oh, you mean NOT nutritious."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Ate: (typical boy) "Smell my feet."

-----------------------------------------------------------------

And from my BIGGEST kid of all -

(I hate his crackberry)

We are driving...

Me: "Hypothetically speaking, what happens if I open the car door and your Blackberry "accidentally" falls out and we "accidentally" drive over it?"

Hun: "I get a new Blackberry."

Me: "And what if that phone "accidentally" falls into the garbage disposal and gets ground up into tiny shards?"

Hun: "I GET A NEW WIFE!"