Sunday, July 5, 2009

Not Me! Monday - Superheroes And Emergency Workers

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival full of superheroes and emergency workers was originally created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read how she and everyone else have not been superheroes this week.

It was not me who was SUPER single Mom almost all week while Hun was out of town.

It is not my Hun who had to get in as many business trips out of town as he could because he is about to .... go out of town.

It was certainly not the organization of my house that fell through the cracks this past week, 'cuz SOMETHING had to give.

If my house did in fact become a pig sty this past week, I most certainly did not almost trip over my baby who was laying on the floor, because he was like "Where's Waldo Bam, amongst all the toys and dolls.

It was not me who trekked all the the way out to the suburbs for some shopping on July 1st, only to realize when I got there that I had not placed the Chicago city sticker on my car and today was the deadline.

It was not me who was praying out loud, all the way home, that I would not become prey to a cop for failing to have my city sticker.

I did not then also realize that my plates expire in June (06-09) and I did not place my new plate sticker on the car yet.

It was not me who experienced shortness of breath and heart palpitations and I certainly did not almost vomit when I saw a cop on my tail in my rear view mirror.

I was not pleasantly surprised that I made it home without getting pulled over, even though the cop could clearly see my plate sticker was expired.

When I went to place my new stickers on my car, I did not then come to know that my plates actually expire (09 -09), not (06-09).
It did not then occur to me that I was slightly dyslexic and the new sticker for June that I had, was actually meant for my husbands car.

I did not then pray out loud that my husband make it home from work without being pulled over.

It was not my Superhero husband who noticed, on his way home from Synagogue Friday night, that our neighbor's garbage can was on fire and was right next to the house.

It was not Hun who ran home and retrieved our fire extinguisher when there was no answer on the neighbor's door.

When the door finally opened, my kids and husband and I did not hear this,
"David, you stupid sh$#, you can't throw HOT COALS in the Fu&*in garbage can."


When the fire extinguisher did not work, I did not seize the arrival of the fire department and police as an opportunity for my "Emergency Workers" obsessed three year old son to have some fun.

I did not teach my son, after waving to the firemen, to make a fist and pull his elbow up and down.

He did not totally freak out when the horn blared unexpectedly.

When the cop came across to say hello, I was not secretly relieved that Hun had all his appropriate stickers on the car.


4 have shown Orah a little love:

Shelly said...

LOL So funny about the stickers & plates! Glad nobody got pulled over!

Anonymous said...

Niiiiice, ur dyslexic and your neighbor is to put it mildly, a complete idiot. WHo the hell puts hot coals in the garbage??
Suddenly, I am not feeling sooo blond today.
And niiice almost tripping over BAM. Will tell him when he's older, but Im sure, you'll end up doing a lot worse, being the SUPER mom that you are ;)

- Miss. S. said...

that is the worst feeling...waiting to be pulled over...thankfully it didn't happen.

And glad you did not launch the baby across the room like a soccer ball...oh my!

I didn't know you had a firehubby too? Learn all kinds of things from this post :)

Heidi @ Tayterjaq's Rebels said...

You are so funny! I missed reading your antics while I was away...and now you are going away. BUMMER!